Through the Dark
by Jumping out of aeroplaneees
Summary: He was constantly fighting his inner demon, but eventually it won. It ruined his life, pushed his loved ones away, and made him a monster. All he wanted was to pick up the pieces of his broken life and repair it.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is definitely a darker story. It deals a lot with depression and drug/alcohol abuse. There are a lot of flashbacks in this story as well because Austin is telling his story.

* * *

I can remember a time when I was in a better place in my life: A time where I had the most beautiful girlfriend in the world and the best group of friends. It was only a few years ago, but it seems a lot longer than that. Everything in my life has spiraled downhill, all because of one stupid mistake. I have learned a lot in those years. I have become a different person: a better person. But nothing will be the same. Everyday I wake up with the feeling in my gut that I fucked up completely. All I can do is sit back and think about every single memory of my past. Those memories haunt me in my sleep because I know I should do something about it, but I know I can't because they won't listen to me.

So I guess I should start somewhere, but where? I have been here for months and I still have not confessed anything.

I have been in and out of here so many times that I should be comfortable talking about my past, but I still can't grasp the fact that I fucked my whole life up at the age of seventeen. I'm getting better, I swear.

I got dressed and walked into meeting room. The plain white walls and tile floors made it seem like an insane asylum. In a way, it could be considered an insane asylum, but at the same time, it was far from it.

Miranda, the group leader, sat up and walked me over to the couches.

"Austin, it's nice to see you today, we were just listening to Mark tell his story," she whispered as she was walking me over.

"Sorry for interrupting," I mumbled.

I listened to Mark talk about his story, hoping to find inspiration where to begin. We only really had time for three a session because they took forever to explain. This is my fourth and hopefully last time here. I can only hope I can fix everything and start a new chapter in my life.

"Thank you for sharing, Mark," Miranda smiled. "Is there anyone else who would like to tell their story?"

This was it. This was my moment. I stood up and everyone looked at me.

"Hi, I'm Austin," I mumbled.

"Where to begin," I sighed.

"Austin, start wherever you would like."

"I fucked my whole life up at the age of seventeen and I'm begging for forgiveness, even though I know I don't deserve it."

"How so?" One girl asked.

"I hung out with the wrong people and got tied up with drugs."

"Weren't you a pop star?" a boy asked. "My sister loved you."

"Yeah, when I got arrested, they immediately terminated my contract."

"Well, what happened?"

"My former friend, Ethan and I went to a party in the northern part of Miami. This was a part of Miami my parents always told me to stay away from. I got tied up with the wrong people and ended up fucking things up."

_Flashback_

I got into the car and drove up to the northern part of Miami with my pal, Ethan. We were going to an underground party he was invited to.

"Dude, you ready for this?" he beamed and I shrugged.

"I guess. This is my first party, though."

"Just let loose and have fun," he advised. His version of fun was way different than mine.

We got to the party and he immediately went into the back room of his basement, dragging me with him.

"Did you get the stuff?" he asked two of the boys sitting in the backroom.

"Yeah," they smirked as they tossed him a little baggie.

"Who brought the pop star?"

"He's a friend of mine," Ethan replied.

"I'm Austin," I mumbled.

"Well, Austin, I'm Jared and this is Cody."

"Nice to meet you."

I already knew I was in a shady situation. I had to leave. I had to get out.

"I'm going to grab a beer," I said and started to walk out.

"Whoa," Ethan yelled as he grabbed my arm. "Not so fast, Moon. Come on, take a hit."

"I don't smoke, it could ruin my voice," I stuttered.

"Come on, just one hit."

I kept telling myself no, but the inner voice in my head was forcing me to try it. I was a teenager; I was supposed to experiment, right?

I shakily grabbed the joint out of Ethan's hand and took a hit. I started to cough like crazy. I felt my throat getting tight as it was filling up with smoke. I hated the feeling so much.

"That wasn't so bad, right?" Ethan asked and I sighed.

"It was awful."

"You're not used to it. Come on, take another one."

"No way, I'm out."

"Pop star Austin Moon is too good to do drugs?" Jared cooed in a mocking tone.

"He's too good for us. Clean cut, Austin Moon," Ethan whispered to Cody.

I grabbed the joint out of Ethan's hand and took another hit. It was a little better this time, but it still felt like the worst feeling in the world. I tried to put it down, but that little voice kept telling me to take another hit and so I did. I was high for the first time and it felt so fucking great.

_End Flashback_

"So you got high and now you're addicted to drugs?" Mark asked.

"No, there is a lot more than that. Is there still time left?"

"Yes, Austin we have two more hours."

"Oh, I guess someone else should speak."

"No, Austin, go on," this one girl smiled. "You've listened to all of our stories. Now it's time we hear yours."

I cleared my throat, preparing myself for the next chapter of my story.


	2. Chapter 2

"Cody and Jared got arrested for drug possession, so I had no one to hang out with. I ended up hanging out with Ethan again and we would get drunk every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I cared more about alcohol than my real friends, my family, and my girlfriend. On October 27th, 2012, everything went downhill."

_Flashback_

"Yeah, Als, I'll call you when I get home," I sighed.

"Okay, Austin. Have fun with your aunt. I love you."

"I love you too, Als. I'll text you later on."

I hated lying to her. I hated it so much, but I know she'd break up with me if she found out what I did on the weekends. I know a guy should take his girlfriend out on the weekends, but I saw her every day in school.

"Ready, Moon?" Ethan grinned, holding a case of beer. "There's more in the car, help me out."

"Got it."

We sat in his basement for hours getting drunk. It was my own personal high. I loved the feeling of being buzzed.

Hours passed and I felt my phone go off. It was my mom. She asked me where I was and reminded me that I had a family banquet later tonight.

"Shit, Ethan, I gotta go. I have a banquet."

"Alright, Moon, I'll see you later."

"Right, I slurred."

I started the engine and started to drive to my aunts. I had problems keeping my vision straight. I could barely see the lines on the road. I felt tired, sad, and woozy. The next thing I knew, I was getting signaled to pull over.

I panicked. This was my first time getting pulled over. I knew I was going to lose my license.

I rolled my window down, not saying a single word.

"Sir have you been drinking?"

"No," I lied.

"License and registration."

I handed him my license and the car registration.

"I'll repeat this again, have you been drinking?"

"I have not."

"Would you mind if we tested your blood alcohol content?"

"Yes, I would," I slurred.

"Well, you have to. It's the law. All teen drivers have to."

I sighed and got out of the car. He handed me this weird contraption that I had to blow into.

I put the straw to my mouth and blew into the machine. I handed it to the officer and he looked at me.

"Your BAC is 0.116%, Mr. Moon. You're legally impaired not to drive and you are underage. You're coming with me."

He hand cuffed me and put me in the back of his car. This is what it felt like getting arrested. I knew to never drink again.

_End_

"Austin, you were legally impaired not to walk," Mark scolded.

"I know that."

"So did your parents bail you out?"

"No. They let me sit there over night. They bailed me out the morning after."

"What happened then?"

"They sent me here. I was here for a month. When I got released I knew I was going to change my life for good.

Miraculously, my girlfriend stayed together with me. She told me she had faith in me. I was sober a year, but then I relapsed."

"Alcohol is such a damn shame," a girl named Tessa mumbled.

"It really is."

"I was at my aunts wedding when I relapsed. As soon as I walked into the room, I scoped out the alcohol. I ended up getting smashed before the actual wedding started. The rest of it was a blur.

After the wedding, I would do anything to get my fix. It came to the point where I stored bottles of alcohol in my room and I would get drunk every day after school. My grades started to slip drastically, my friends stayed away from me, and my girlfriend broke up with me.

It was all the same shit. I was sober, I relapsed, I was sober, and I relapsed. I should just give up."

"Why are you here, then?" Tessa asked.

"Because I want to get better and I really mean it this time. I miss Ally more than anything."

"Your girlfriend?"

"Yes, I miss her so much that it makes me sick. If I could I would just end this, but I know she would want me to keep fighting."

"My time is up, I gotta go," I mumbled. "Thanks for listening to me."

I went up to the front desk and asked to make a phone call. I dialed Ally's number and once again I got her voicemail.

"Hi, it's me. Listen, I'm so sorry for everything, but I want to prove to you that I've changed. I want you to trust me again. I want you to love me again, but I know it's impossible. All right. I love you. Don't forget that."

I walked back into my room and plopped down onto the bed. God, I fucked up my life so much and I hated every second of it. I was old enough to check myself out, but I didn't want to. I wanted to make sure I was completely better before checking myself out.

I started to doze off to sleep, but the lady at the office came knocking on my door.

"Austin, you have a visitor."

"Thank you," I smiled. It was probably my dad coming to tell me that I have to get my life straightened out. I was sick of hearing it because I was trying my hardest.


End file.
